Thursday, October 28, 2010

Gender Roles

Being able to excel in most of the things that only men can do, we women nowadays find it easy to play roles in the society that most people years ago will find gender specific. Men and women have roles that apparently cannot be erased by any diversified and modernized society. Glued with the thought that men do musculine things and women only do feminine things, I tend to differ on some areas in which I have already vocally expressed to some of my friends even before.

I have a strong sense of opinion in which wants me to put into the same level how men and women should act in a specific situation. I know that there are some things that men are "supposed" to be doing but in my opinion women should and could do as well.

I am talking about courtship, or expressing to someone an interest which women cannot openly do. It frustrates me to think that us women cannot pursue someone that we wanted to be in a relationship with. Someone once told me that it is ok for a woman to show a man that she is interested with him, however, a woman should never take the first move in saying that she loves him. She should wait for the man to say those words to her. It makes sense yes, but still, talking about the roles in the society, it seems to be a little odd for a woman to pursue someone specifically a man. Say I am old fashioned but does that move destroys how God created men and women and the parts that they are supposed to be playing?

I am particularly fancying someone as of the moment. I have been vocal on how much I liked him. But that leaves me with much thwarting because I have to stop right there. I cant make the next move. I made him known the fact that I do like him and now, I must wait for him to do the next incite. See this is where I was heading. If I were a boy (Beyonce singing in the background right now…) I could have done something more. Perhaps call him every so often to check up on him. Or send him things that he likes and that would make him feel better. Probably tell him how much I wanted to spend time with him, maybe tell him my plans for him in the future. Maybe ask him questions about his family and his work, tell him how much I wanted to be a part of it. It could be that I could befriend his friends and tell them to make "lakad" to me for him. If he rejects me once, I could still wait for him to realize that I am a valuable woman and that I would do all things possible just for me to be with him. I could make him think that I am sincere with my intentions. All these things a man can easily do (unless he is very torpe) and is acceptable for everyone, but not for a lady like me. Men can get away with their lady beloved. It is easy for them to do that since they have the green lights to do those things. Because they are men.

Probably if you're a guy and you are reading this, you could be thinking that a women who will do such thing is desperate! You could be asking, why is she doing those things when in fact she should wait for a man to do those things to her?! Well that is exactly my point! We cannot do those things simply because it is morally unacceptable for a woman like me to act as a man in the play of courtship. And yeah this is what frustrates me the most.

It bilks me to think that I have to stop in a specific step and not proceed to the next because I am expected to stay where I am. I am a go getter, and I would be proud to say that I do get what I want. Not this time and not in this situation. There is nothing I could do but to wait for the next move coming from the other side. If the moves are not executed then the game for me is definitely over.

If you were to ask me what I will do with the lucky man im liking right now? I would say id do nothing. Probably wait. Or just dismiss the emotions, ignore him maybe. Or?!.....


kay said...

Just go for it. What's the worse that can happen? He says "I know." So what? At least now, the ball is in his court and you can breathe easier. I took that leap. Until now the guy and I talk and I know that as long as we live under the same sky, US is not impossible.

jssica wabbit said...

I wrote this a year ago. Im still friends with that man and I know that I still have feelings for him, not as intense as it was before though. I never told him anything about what I really feel. But I made sure that my fondness for him is felt. :)

Thanks Kay for your encouragement. :) I know, and I believe that anything is possible. :)